Persuading Cohabiting Couples to Move Apart -- Can it be Done?

Persuading Cohabiting Couples to Move Apart -- Can it be Done?

MEDIA ADVISORY, March 19 /Christian Newswire/ -- Final Briefing (#3) on the book, "Living Together: Myths, Risks & Answers" will be Thursday, March 20th at 2 p.m. ET.

Call (641) 715-3200, Dial in Access Code 640718#

In the first briefing, Mike McManus noted that the number of cohabiting couples soared 12-fold from 430,000 in 1960 to 5.4 million couples in 2006. With only 2.2 million marriages, cohabitation is the dominant way male-female unions are formed. Yet few realize that cohabitation is a double cancer of marriage. First, it's diverted millions from getting married. There were 21 million never-married Americans in 1970, but 60 million in 2006 - a tripling while population grew only 48%. It is also a killer at the center of marriage. Couples who live together before marriage are 50% more likely to divorce than those who remained apart.

"Living Together" outlines five Answers, three of which were covered in Session #2:
1. Give couples a premarital inventory
2. Train couples in healthy marriages to mentor couples preparing for marriage.
3. Teach communication and conflict resolution skills

Answers #4 and #5 will be addressed in this final briefing.

Answer #4: Move Apart
The most important step a cohabiting couple can take to increase their odds of a lifelong marriage, is to move apart. However, how can they be persuaded to do so? The McManuses have found these arguments work with some couples:
1. Moving apart will solve some problems. They frequently argue about the fair share each contributes to household expense. Moving apart ends that debate.
2. Separation offers a new beginning, a chance to take a fresh look at each other.
3. It aligns their relationship with God's will, to live apart till the wedding.
4. It also offers time, space and hope, if they take rigorous marriage preparation.

Answer #5: Remain Chaste Until the Wedding
In an exercise called "The Optional Premarital Sexual Covenant," we offer data showing that sexually active couples are two-thirds more likely to divorce than those who remain chaste. Therefore we ask couples to consider signing a pledge to stop having sex. If they sign and fall short, they have to tell their mentors. Of the 58 couples the McManuses have personally mentored, only nine were chaste when they came to them. Of the 49 others, 43 signed on. None of the couples they mentored divorced.

To request a review copy of "Living Together," email melissa.teutsch@howardpublishing.com.

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